Slaves

Home	Masters	Slaves	Workshops	Events	Links	Sign-up

Traits of a good Slave

Not all Slaves will have all of the following traits. However, these traits do reflect what is within a true and successful Slave. (This list should not be considered all inclusive. The masculine form has been used throughout for ease, his/her, himself/herself as well as Master/Mistress etc. should always be inferred where appropriate.)

Acceptance: Acceptance of your self worth, your needs, desires and what you possess within your soul. Acceptance of your limitations and those of the Master that you are serving. The ability to accept another human being for the person they are, including their shortcomings, and especially to accept your own shortcomings. Accepting what being a Slave is to the individual and not being ashamed or intimidated by the needs within, but happy in ones own mindset.

Communication: The ability to talk and freely discuss things, is an integral part of any relationship. This is essential within the relationship between a Master and a Slave. A Slave should have the skills to communicate his needs, wants, desires, fears, thoughts, limits, or whatever else comes along. The ability to talk also calls into play the honesty and truthfulness of the Master. Once communication is open, it should remain that way -- provided the Slave does not stop communicating honestly. To not communicate, is to endanger yourself and your Master emotionally.

Compassion: The ability to see and at least attempt to understand the emotional aspects of your Master's psyche. To understand and be aware of the multitude of issues within reality that can, and do, affect a Master physically, emotionally, and mentally. To be able to apply that understanding to many situations that arise within daily life that may prevent you from serving your Master to the best of your abilities, as well, as those situations that may prevent your Master from dominating you to the best of his own abilities. Using compassion wisely to allow you to aide your Master, supporting him during times of stress, shows that you are truly a well-rounded Slave. One who realizes that a Master and a Slave are people too.

Courtesy: Courtesy is the ability to show proper manners -- pleases and thank you's. To address someone with a respectful tone of voice. You should always show courtesy to others around you. No one is exempted from this, Master or Slave. Your rank is never an excuse for a lack of courtesy.

Grace: Elegance in the manner a Slave presents himself is an important and desirable personality trait. The way a Slave carries himself, displays his subservience, no matter how graphic, should still flow with style and grace. A Slave's commitment to his role should be displayed with pride and without hesitance. The Slave should be comfortable displaying his rank and should be able to look into himself for reinforcement.

Submission: This is the most important trait in a Slave. It is the inherent natual ability to accept direction as part of a team. To accept being directed in a respectful, intelligent and humble manner. The strength of character which allows you to relinquish the control necessary in a power exchange relationship. The ability to surrender yourself in the interest of a larger picture.

Honesty: Honesty is the ability to speak up, to be open and truthful about what you say. A Slave doesn't hide his emotions, fears, limits, fantasies, ideas, thoughts, etc. A Slave doesn't tell his Master what he thinks the Master wants to hear. Honesty is the basis of trust, without it there is no trust. And, without trust there is no true relationship. A successful Slave is an honest one, one who does not lie or attempt to deceive. One who is truthful when he speaks. Most importantly, a Slave is honest about his level of experience -- to lie is to endanger his own life.

Humility: Humility is the ability to see yourself as fallible. To see yourself as a person, not just a Slave. To see that sometimes in reality your needs must be set aside for the better of the relationship. A successful Slave knows he will make mistakes, that he is not perfect. A successful Slave is always open to learning new things, gaining new experiences, sharing his wants and desires with his Master.

Intelligence: Intelligence is the ability to learn the proper way of playing with the "toys" inherent in the "lifestyle". The willingness and ability to research and learn about BDSM itself. The ability to take the time to learn their partner outside the roles of domination and submission, to learn him as the person that he is, his likes and dislikes. The ability to teach your Master what pleases you and therefore, what will help to increase your bond.

Loyalty: This is a very important trait in a successful Slave. It is the ability to uphold your personal honor and remain true to any agreement(s) between you and your Master. Fickleness is a very unattractive trait in a Slave, and can be ultimately dangerous to the emotional bond between a Master and a Slave.

Patience: A successful Slave has patience. The ability to wait for things. To allow his Master to demonstrate the subtleties of how to please him. Learning that often the journey is more important than the destination.

Pride: Pride is the ability to know your capacities, and realize that you are not only a good person, but a good Slave. Pride is the ability to recognize your own strengths. This does not mean you should be closed minded to new ideas, nor does it mean you should be unaware of your faults, or weaknesses, or keep an inflated ego. Pride in your submission is a beautiful thing. Arrogance, or false pride, can be deadly. False pride usually masks insecurities which can be life threatening.

Respect: A successful Slave will show respect at all times, until such time as the Master proves he is unworthy of such respect. A disrespectful Slave does not earn the respect of his Master or of the Slaves around him. By giving respect to others, you earn it for yourself.

Self-Respect: A successful Slave values himself, and respects his own limits. A solid sense of self-worth is a necessity for a successful Slave. Willingness to share your needs and desires is key to establishing a succesful rapport between a Slave and his Master.

Service: A successful Slave serves his Master by sharing and celebrating common goals. As a Slave you are there to help your Master learn and fulfill his potential. Performing acts of obedience and submitting to your Master's wishes should be a method of letting your Master explore himself and his own internal power.

Guidelines

Be Patient: Every slave / Master is different. You must take the time to explore each other. To learn each other's strengths and weaknesses.

Be Humble: You maybe God's gift to the world, but no one needs to hear it or wants to hear it. You will have ample opportunities to show how good you are -- and plenty of opportunities to make a fool of yourself. No matter what you claim, the "real you" will show through in a BDSM scene.

Be Open: You can always learn something new regardless of how many times you may have repeated the same scene or task. Each time presents new opportunities to see things from a different perspective. Make a point of opening yourself completely and make a connection with your Master on a higher level. You should try to function with one spirit.

Communicate: You are responsible for finding out basic, essential information about the people you play with, such as experience, limits, likes and dislikes, health information, etc. Engaging in BDSM without this knowledge is like playing Russian Roulette. Talk about your head-space and your view of BDSM with your Master, so that any uncertainties can be dealt with before a scene starts. Clearly spell out roles, rules, limits, and conditions. Do not take for granted that your Master instinctively knows the ground rules.

Be Honest: If you lack experience in an area that your Master would like experiment with, be honest about it. Your Master has the right to know that! Be honest with yourself and him. Let him know your fears and concerns about a certain scene before you engage in it. There is no shame in admitting a lack of knowledge. Safety should always be the first concern, taking priority over how "hot" a particular scene is.

Be Realistic: Never expect that a scene will completely fulfill and be able to meet all your expectations. Every experience is to to taken for what it was. You should take all aspects of the scene with you when it is finished and determine what you can learn from it. It is very important to make the break between what happened in the scene and what is real. The roles you and your Master and any other partners took on exist only within the framework of the scene.

Be Healthy: BDSM, like any strenuous activity, requires that its participants - both active/dominant and passive/submissive - be in top physical and emotional health. The amount you sleep, your eating habits, your alcohol and drug intake, and everyday stress affects your response and endurance during a scene. Don't attempt to do BDSM when your physical or emotional energy is low. As a Slave, you have a responsibility to be in control of yourself and inform your Master of any problems that you may be experiencing. An attitude of "drugs and alcohol don't affect me that much ... I can do it anyway" violates your Master's trust in you and can be dangerous to both of you. If you don't want to accept the responsibilities, you shouldn't be playing the game!

Have Fun! After all, sex is all about having a good time. You have earned and you are entitled to the unique, intense pleasure which comes from responsible, creative BDSM play.

Obligations to a Master

The Slave must have a minimum of two years BDSM Hard or Soft experience. Unless decided otherwise by the administrative council of the DÔM-MS Academy and its members. The Slave must have completely accepted himself and his role. The Slave must also be cognisant of his limits with BDSM. The Slave must be able and willing to demonstrate knowledge of the qualities, talents and limits within this role.

At all times, a Slave must exhibit an appropriate attitude and display humilty and deference towards his Master as well as towards all other Masters in attendance. This level of deference applies regardless of whether participating in a scene or during a break.

The Slave must always be conscious of comportment, acts, speech and any other gestures. The Slave always has the right to withdraw services to a Master, providing this is done with an honourable justification.

The Slave never relinquishes the right to veto any request made by a Master. The Slave also has the right to question and be consulted regarding the path of training assigned.

Barring justified notice or legitimate unavailability, the Slave must always be available to serve his Master or the DÔM-MS Academy as required. The usage of a Slave is always subject to the approval of his acknowledged Master where applicable. A Slave remains the property on his acknowledged Master regardless of what transpires during his time serving others. The Slave's coller is essential to signify his status and demonstrates his submission to the DÔM-MS Academy as well as to his Master and must always be worn during meetings, training sessions and workshops.

As a reflection to his Master, a Slave must always carry himself with decorum and dignity. The Slave must always place themselves to the right of their Master or 1 foot behind as appropriate to the situation. As such the Slave must always proudly follow his Master as required. These guidelines must be respected unless a break time has been granted.

During meetings and other official gatherings such as training sessions Slaves do not have the right to speak freely. In order to request the right to speak, The Slave must raise his right arm and wait to be recognised by a superior. At official meetings the President has the right to select a Slave to sit at the table. This Slave must sit to the right of the President.

The Slave is always subject to the desires, tastes and sexual fantasies of his Master. Refusal or indifference to his Master's requests can result in a punishment from either his Master or the DÔM-MS Academy itself.

The Slave must always remain humble, obedient and deferntial towards his Master. Occasionally this may create discord and even ill will towards his Master. To this end, the Slave must remember that these moments and experiences are a means to an end within his devlopment within BDSM.

A Slave must always demonstrate respect to his superiors. They must be addressed as Sir or Ma'am/Madame as appropriate. As a sign of respect and deference a Slave must never look directly into the eyes of a superior unless directed otherwise. Additionally, the Slave must offer to perform services for his superiors. These services should be in accordance with the desires and wants of the superior or related to the Slave's own development within BDSM.

A Slave must be willing to serve other Masters without question if he is offered to them by his acknowledged Master. As with the acknowledged Master, the Slave has the same rights of refusal providing there are legitimate reasons.

Becoming the property of a Master is accomplished by a Master indicating to the President or Vice-President of the DÔM-MS Academy his desire to become the Legitimate or Acknowledged Master of a Slave. The Slave will be contacted by the President or Vice-Presdent to find out if he is interested in accepting the offer. If the Slave is in agreement, an official request is made on paper and signed by the Master in question. This document is signed by the Slave indicating his acceptance and he will be recognized as the property of this Master.

A Slave has an obligation to fully integrate himself within the DÔM-MS Academy as a member of a family. The Slave must do everything possible to maintain a good and positive rapport with all the Masters and Slaves in the DÔM-MS Academy. Prejudice, discrimination and intolerance are absolutely unacceptable. Failure to live up to this may result in a punishment of a sexual or other nature.

All members of the DÔM-MS Academy must, without exception respect the privacy and confidentiality of its members, the club itself as well as all activities which take place within the heart of the DÔM-MS Academy. Under no circumstances can anything that was heard or done during meetings, workshops, training sessions or any other activity involving the DÔM-MS be divulged.

Copyright 2008 DOM-MS Academy. All rights reserved. . Contact the webmaster if you experience difficulties.